Sunday, December 03, 2006

Some Gentleman’s Game This

On Tuesday, Nov 28th, the front page of TOI carried a photograph that quite simply made my blood boil. Couple of Lok Janashakthi Party “activists” smearing cow dung, on the picture of the Indian cricket team, and on the walls of cricketer Mohhamad Kaif’s house. What sort of a behaviour is that? What filthy attitude is that? Okay, so the whole country is angry because of the team’s dismal performance. I am too. We are a cricket crazy nation. We are an otherwise crazy nation too. The players are some kind of demi-gods, with temples dedicated to them. India wins; it’s a nation wide party. If it loses, then it’s the Great Depression. Before every world cup, people take it on themselves to conduct pujas on the players’ behalf, for the team to perform well. It’s like the team is this giant kid, going to give it’s broad exams, with the expectations of a family of a billion, weighing upon it.

And I have always thought that we have a team made for the population. It’s equally unpredictable. And just as crazy. It loses matches that seem like a breeze. And when the whole world has said the last word, the Men in Blue go down under and pull out a miracle.

But honestly, this time I think we have broken all boundaries. Both the team in dismally sad performance, and the rest of the country in over reacting. What right do some nutty party non-workers to go deface a player’s house? Smear it with cow dung? A follow up a few days later said that the family was considering moving out of UP because it had become difficult for them to live in such psychotically hostile surroundings. If I remember right, some hooligans has previously thrown stones at the house in a previous incident. I can understand their decision to move, what I don’t understand is why.

It is about time we act a little more grown-uppish about the game. Okay, it is not just a game, it is a religion. But no one says religion has to always involve violent knee-jerk reactions, and harm to people and property. Or is it that religious riots and violence in the name of Gods, and now demi- gods, has become the part of the Indian way of life?

First thing to do, would be to actually chuck that precious coach of ours. I don’t really care to analyze his coaching or cricketing abilities. He just can’t seem to know how to conduct himself in public, and honestly, he is made more news for his controversial comments and nit-pickings- first with the then-caption, and now with the MPs, than he has ever done for the team’s performance under him. We don’t need a coach to teach our players how to play cricket, they are good at it on their own. We need a coach to bring the players together to perform as a team, and perform well. And this, Mr. Chappell has sorely, dismally, failed to do. He is appointed to do a job in a country that is not his own, he could begin with having some respect for that country. And not play the smart ass there, and always pass the buck to someone else all the time. I don’t remember one incident, where Chappy has come forward to take responsibility, and said, “the team didn’t perform well, it was a joint responsibility, we are sorry”. Instead, he is full of complaints, for the team, for the captain, for the MPs and for the board. WTF?!!!

And now, dear darling Members of the mighty Indian Parliament, are you really so starved for attention? Why is that you are so hell bent on losing what ever little respect that we have for you? Ooh ooh! A defense scandal! The defense minister has to step down! Ooh! Ooh! A communal riot! The CM should step down! Ooh! Ooh! Pakistan sneezed! The Prime Minister step down! Please, stop thinking that asking people to resign whenever there is a controversy, will immediately solve all the country’s problems. If it did, we won’t need you. Well, on second thoughts, we don’t need you anyways.

And to my fellow media guys, people! Why do have to work so hard to make our MPs look like a bunch of bumbling fools? Stop trying to reinvent the wheel, and start publishing on some real news. If you don’t stop hounding the minister to get sound bites, and stupid remarks, you probably miss Ash and Aby’s baby lighting a diya together, Ganga kinaare, after they fought about Ash- Hritik kiss being 2 secs too long. After all that is breaking news we all are holding our breath for.

And to the Men In Blue, COME ON guys!!!!

Miss Know-It All said: The blue billion rises. The so do the Men- in- Blues! It’s all just fizz. Sab moh maya hai!


pRicky said...

YOu know its even more difficult for people like me who arent there cause i have no one to talk to about the team losing... I am so sad at their losing and i hate Ricky ponting more making all those centuries and i hate it when i see scoreboard reading 2 s.tendulkar.. and I am not even there to debate wbout how good dravid is and the other guys...its painful... there is no news here brit news sucks and there is too much happening in india that i dont even know it feels like a void... and well basically i dont know which defence minister is going to steo down???
but i hate it when none sports people take to insulting sportsmen... these people just dont know what is it that goes on the field... anyways breaking news phenomenon is too spontaneous...
doesnt mean much BBC is also goign through the same...
but i likethe post...

ToOothlEss WOndeR! said...

TOI and Indian cricket team.
now that's what i call a combo number 5!
i mean c'mon.. hahaha.. i cant stop laughin. some jackasses smearing cowdung on the blue men, and the paper having it on the front page in color.
i'd use the paper to wipe my ass!
or maybe no...

and what's with the falling in love with three men at once?
i mean you cant do this! i object! not before me!

moontalk said...

@ prick
talk bout irony,u re worried bout ppl not discussing it, n i m worried that they cant shut up bout it!:D
n thanks for liking the post, it's the first time in my life that i wrote bout cricket!n in all probablities, wld be the last!

@ toothless
er...u missed the point of the post by what, a hundred miles?:P
n y do u wanna ship TOI all the way to the might US of A to wipe ur ass??they forgot to give u toilet paper along with ur jaccuzzi?:D
n bout falling in love with 3 men, ah well, wat can i say?some people have all the luck??
n i really didnt kw, u wanted to fall in love with 3 men before me, otherwise i'd ve waited ;P
n there u go bout ur bbqs again!

Me Thinks.. said...

hey nice post! made a lot of sense, and for a change I agree with you.. This one had everything..from stupid politicians to an over hyped game to an ass of a coach to the irresponsible media!
good job..

moontalk said...

er...MT, dont u think u ve been saying "for once i agree with you" in quite a few posts of mine? :D
accept it, i can be right quite a lot of times!!!

Anonymous said...

oh my god.. so much of anger.

but wait a minute, what do you think they should have done iwth that cow dung otherwise. floor their huts? what would the country look like if everyone single guy and girl took defeat morally and reacted peacefully. Arre we would all look like a bunch of idiots. life needs some action and we need peopel like those in janashakti who can just go around smash the glasses, burn the buses and throw shit at people.

here is an interesting converstaion i had with a fren who is an atheist but a cricket buff.

me: wazzap dude, why so blue

dude: morons have lost it again man. they should be burnt alive.

me: i was hearing people sayin the same thing in the bus i came.

dude: they do. Cricket is a know.. a religion.

me: you love it?

dude: they are know GOD man..

me: but then you are a fuckin atheist. you said you are not relegious.

dude: shut up.

I did.

moontalk said...

@ lash,
u my friend have this amazing ability to shut up at appropriate momemnts, i unfortunately or fortunately, do not.
so there!
this is the ONLY time i've written bout cricket, for 21 years of my life i ve resisted that, so well, u kw how much "anger" i ve in me right now :P

Anonymous said...

its that ability to shut up at appropriate moments that has me alive at 24 even. i would have been dead (killed) by now otherwise. why take panga, especially when you have a low BP

Sunshine said...

hey gurlie..guess who?? your one n only mabooo:)! Nice post! Wow..I've been out of touch with the cricket world for about 4 years now. Crazy People!!!
n u falling in love???? I think it's time for a heart to heart gurltalk ;)

Me Thinks.. said...

we agree to disagree on that one!

moontalk said...

@ lash
agree on that one, in ur case atleast.:P
but i dont ve low bp so well!
@ sunshine
hey so cool to see ya here!
n gurl talk...well...yeah, but the topic's kinda become redundant now...i changed my mind u see.

@ mt
well, too late to agree with me, i ve already changed my mind!:P

Arun Pillai said...

Wonder you started thinking seriously these days (kiddin!!!)

And yes buddy, you have been tagged here :

moontalk said...

@ arun,
ermm...must say i'm honoured and all that, but dude u've got my name wrong there :)

Arun Pillai said...

Err...where in earth can i find someone who can spell it properly ?

Anonymous said...

i believe u ve my number :P
alternatively, u can ask anyone who's commented here. think they can all help u out

Arun Pillai said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Arun Pillai said...

<<< alternatively, u can ask anyone who's commented here. think they can all help u out me.....>>>>

That's what i did dude in my prev comment and count how many responded ?