Ohhh, if there’s one thing I hang onto,
It gets me through the night.
I aint gonna do what I don’t want to,
Im gonna live my life.
Shining like a diamond, rolling with the dice,
Standing on the ledge, show the wind how to fly.
When the world gets in my face,
I say, Have A Nice Day.
Have A Nice Day
From the posts that I ve been putting up, everyone seems to be thinking that I'm going through a major depression cycle.
Well, can't really say that this is the happiest time of my life, but its not sad either. In fact it's mostly good. Just that sorrow always affects yoy more than happiness does, isn't it.
Our misfortunes are more easily counted than our blessings.
I never have claimed that I was sane. Or not weird. Some kid once told me that I'm the happiest person she knows. My best friend thinks I'm quite moody. One of my teachers has told me that I should be a little less serious. Someone told me that I'm very laconic. Others think that I cannot shut up for long enough.
I'm a bundle of contradictions. There are a lot of things that I believe...things that I hold on to. And I've realised, more than once, that if I pitt all these things against eah other, most of them will just cancel each other out. That has never bothered me...the fact that I belive in contradictory ideas. And this one fact that I dont have to reason myself out, has kept me sane. Or whatever semblence of sane.
I'm not too emotional, in the sense, I'm not the one to proclaim my love from roof tops. My crushes last all of a month. They never grow into anything serious quite simply because I refuse to let them control me. If there is someone for whom I feel something for, and that other person does not reciprocate it, I'm not gonna pine away for that. Maybe that's why I never fall in love.
But I do get hurt. Pretty easy. But I get over it too. I don't let that spoil my life for more than 2 days at a strech...okay maybe a week. Again, my best friends disagrees. She says that I never let go. Okay so I dont. When ever something goes wrong, I always see a parallel. So? I can't change the past. I don't try to, just simply coz I don't want to. But I don't let the past pull me down. If a friend walks out on me, I don't feel miserable thinking what we had, and what it's become now. I can think back and appreciate, and feel happy bout what we had, while not feeling let down, angry or depressed. This, for 'you know who' and SK.
I don't regret anything in my life. NOTHING. The gud, bad, the crazy, beautiful, all are just as welcome memories, moments. I can move past anything...friends walking out of my life, me walking out of theirs, losing, winning, the whole deal. But I never let go anything that has been a part of my life. Something, someone that/who once enters my mind, stays. It, they become a part of me. Period.
When I depressed, I write stuff like this. But then I may also write stuff like this. If one post of mine funny (ok attempt at funny) the next may be depressed.
So I've a split personality. As someone said, "You got a problem, precious?"